


The 6 Things Evan Learns About Dating Jared Kleinman

by sochill



Series: Knowing and Being Known (in Order to Love and Be Loved) [4]
Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, Light Angst, M/M, if jared is soft he's not because he is no he's not <3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-05
Updated: 2020-11-11
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:26:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 14,870
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27406522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sochill/pseuds/sochill
Summary: Evan and Jared's relationship from Evan's point of view. Plus all of the things he learns about Jared.
Relationships: Evan Hansen/Jared Kleinman
Series: Knowing and Being Known (in Order to Love and Be Loved) [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1987372
Comments: 8
Kudos: 91





	1. He Has Opinions on PDA

**Author's Note:**

> Can you tell I leaned really hard into the list format while writing this series?

It was about a week after Jared came out to his mom that Evan brought up the idea of telling their friends.

“We don’t have to if you’re not ready obviously.” He said, playing with Jared’s fingers. “But I just thought I’d ask.”

“So you want to?”

“Well, yeah.”

“Okay. Me too.”

“Yeah?” Evan looked up at him.

Jared nodded. “I want to tell them.”

Evan smiled. He laced his fingers through Jared’s and leaned into his shoulder. “Cool.”

“Hey guys.” Evan waved as Zoe and Connor walked up, arguing as always.

“Hey Evan.” Zoe smiled. “Hey Lana.” She looped her arm around Alana’s waist.

Evan chewed his lip. Jared was late. They were planning on telling everyone today and Jared wasn’t _here_.

“You okay?” Connor nodded at him.

“Huh?” Evan turned away from the hall door. “Yeah. I’m good.”

“Jared say something annoying this morning?” Zoe teased.

“No.” Evan flushed. “Me and Jared are fine. We um actually wanted to uh, talk to you guys.”

Zoe snorted. “We?”

“Yeah well, I don’t really know where he is.” Evan glanced at his phone. No new messages. “So I’m not sure if-”

“Hello fellow school goers.” Jared announced as he walked up.

“Hey, we were just talking about you!” Alana said.

“Oh?” Jared eyed her. “Why?”

“Evan said you had a big announcement for us.” Connor crossed his arms and leaned against a locker.

“Did he now?” Jared raised his eyebrows at Evan.

“I thought we were going to… you know.”

“Yeah but like right _now?_ ”

“Do you not want to?”

“No we can. I don’t care. I just didn’t know we were doing it now.”

“Jared we don’t have-”

“I want to! Calm down dude. I was just surprised that it was so-”

“Can one of you just tell us?” Zoe interrupted.

“Yeah if you don’t say something interesting soon I’m gonna get bored and leave.” Connor said.

Evan looked at Jared who nodded. “We um…” He glanced over again. “Jared and I…”

“We’re dating.” Jared said. “And also, I’m gonna be late to history. So I’ll catch you losers later.” He shot them finger guns and then walked off down the hallway.

Evan stood there, a little bit in shock until Zoe lightly punched his shoulder.

“You guys are together?” She grinned. “That’s awesome. How long?”

“Uh, a couple weeks.” Evan said, glancing at Jared’s disappearing form.

“How exciting!” Alana bounced on her toes. “Oh! We can double date now!”

“Yeah, maybe.” Evan nodded. He wasn’t sure Jared would be into that. Besides, they hadn’t even had a real date with just the two of them yet.

Zoe caught his eye and laughed. The bell rang. She leaned over and whispered, “Don’t worry I’ll talk her out of it.”

Evan sighed. “Thanks. See you later.”

“Evan!” Jared waved him over before turning back to the argument he was having with Connor.

Evan got out of class late so they were already five minutes into their fifteen minute break. He hurried over to his friends. Jared’s hand was still half outstretched. Evan reached for it but Jared suddenly gestured wildly and dropped his hand back to his side. Evan awkwardly dropped his own hand. Zoe caught his eye and mimed a sad face. Evan rolled his eyes as he felt his face flush.

“Hey.” Jared turned toward him after Connor flipped him off and went to get a drink from the vending machine. “How was English?”

“Good.” Evan glanced at Jared’s hand but it was in his pocket. He felt like even just standing there made it obvious that he wanted to hold Jared’s hand. He hooked his thumbs in his backpack straps. “How were your classes?”

“Eh.” Jared shrugged. “School is school.”

Evan nodded. “You doing anything after school today?”

“Nope.” Jared pulled out his phone and frowned at the text from his mom. “Wanna hang?”

“Yeah.” Evan fidgeted. Had he just dreamed the fact that he and Jared were dating? Because it certainly didn’t _feel_ like they were. Even when they’d been hiding it, it felt more real. Last week Jared would catch his eye and smile. Or nudge him when they stood next to each other. Or knock his knee into Evan’s under the lunch table. But now they were dating openly and Jared had hardly looked at him all day.

The bell rang, startling Evan out of his thoughts.

“Oh shit.” Jared’s head snapped up. “My class is in the gym building, I’m gonna be so late.” He shoved his phone in his pocket. “See you at lunch.” He called, rushing off.

Evan looked at the lunch table from across the courtyard as he approached it. Jared was sitting on one bench with his backpack beside him. Alana and Zoe were sitting on one bench together. Connor was stretched out across one, not so secretly smoking.

Evan tried to keep his face neutral as he walked toward the one empty bench.

“Oh hey.” Jared looked up. He shoved his backpack onto the floor and slid over toward Alana to make room.

“Oh.” Evan sat beside him. “Thanks.”

Jared glanced at him, half frowning half laughing. “Yeah no problem.”

Evan forced a laugh.

Jared raised an eyebrow. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah.” Evan smiled. “I’m good.”

“Okay.” Jared didn’t look convinced but he turned back to his food.

A second later, Jared was sliding his hand into Evan’s. He didn’t look over again, appearing very interested in his tater tots. Evan smiled.

“Jared?” Alana was pulling notebooks out of her backpack. “Can you help me with this math problem. We went over it in class but I didn’t really understand it.”

“Sure.” Jared said, taking a drink of Evan’s water. Evan shoved him and he stuck out his tongue before turning back to Alana. “Which one?”

“This one.” Alana pointed. “I get the first part. But every time I do the second part I get fourteen but that’s not the answer.”

Jared squinted at the paper. “Jesus how do you write so neatly?”

Alana beamed. “Thanks.”

“Not a compliment.” Jared said. “Oh okay. So you’re doing it right you’re just using the wrong number. Pencil?”

Alana quickly produced one from her pink pencil bag and handed it to him.

“Okay so,” Jared pulled his hand away from Evan’s to hunch over the notebook. “You’re supposed to use the value of x here, not the number you got from this part. And then the seven you got before goes here.”

Alana watched with a slight frown as Jared scribbled messy numbers under her neat ones. “Oh!” Her face lit up. “Oh that makes sense.” She twisted the notebook toward herself and read over Jared’s work. “Okay so for this one,” She moved to the next problem and started writing quickly. “It would be… eighty-one?”

Jared looked over her work. “Yep.”

“Yes!” Alana grinned. “Thank you so much Jared. You’re a lifesaver.”

“It’s what I do.” Jared said, turning back to his lunch.

He didn’t take Evan’s hand again. Which didn’t bother Evan. Really he didn’t mind if they held hands or not it was just… something felt different.

Before, every time they were alone (and therefore allowed to be a couple) Jared was so affectionate. It had honestly been really shocking to Evan. He’d expected Jared to be a ‘touch me and I’ll punch you’ kind of boyfriend. But he wasn’t. He was always laying on Evan or wrapping his arms around him or holding his hand or kissing him. And Evan loved it because it meant he got all the physical affection he wanted without having to initiate it. But now there was just… nothing. Evan started to worry that he’d done something wrong. Maybe Jared wasn’t ready to tell everyone but he did it because Evan already brought it up. And now maybe Jared was uncomfortable. Or angry even.

“Hey.” Jared elbowed him. “Spaz. Did you hear me?”

Evan blinked. “What? No. Sorry I was spacing out.”

“I noticed.” Jared snorted. “I said do you want me to come over right after school or like later tonight or whatever?”

“Oh. You can come over right after.”

“Cool. Meet me by your locker?”

“Sure.”

“Alright. Me and Alana have a test to get to. See you kids later.” Jared saluted as he and Alana started toward their math class.

Evan watched them go. Zoe slid across the bench.

“Is everything okay with you two?”

“Huh?” Evan turned back around. “What do you mean?”

“Nothing really.” Zoe shrugged. “Just seemed weird this morning and then like… I don’t know. You guys aren’t acting any different than when you were friends.”

“I know.” Evan sighed. “I don’t know why he’s being weird.”

“It’s probably just normal Jared moodiness.” Zoe punched his shoulder. “I’m gonna head to class. Walk with me?”

Evan nodded. He stood up and they waved goodbye to Connor who made no move to get up despite the sound of the bell.

“Hey. Ready to go?” Evan asked as Jared finally showed up at his locker. It was ten minutes after the bell and Evan had sort of been worrying that Jared had left without him.

“Yeah sorry.” Jared was shoving a notebook into his backpack. “Had to go over this test question cause I guess I read it totally wrong so I wrote a whole three paragraphs about the wrong topic.”

“Oh my god dude.”

“It’s fine. He said he’d just grade it as if it was the question I thought it was.” Jared grinned. “Finessed myself an A.”

“Congrats.” Evan laughed.

They walked home together like they usually did. Jared rambled about school and music and whatever else. Evan listened and tried not to count how many times their hands brushed and Jared didn’t do anything about it. He couldn’t figure out what was going on. Jared didn’t seem angry when he talked to Evan so why was he acting so different?

Evan chewed his lip as they made their way up to his room. He wasn’t sure how to bring it up.

Jared hopped onto Evan’s bed and stretched out. Evan took his time setting down his stuff and untying his shoes before setting them neatly next to his other pairs.

When he finally finished, Jared reached his hand out and wiggled his fingers.

“What do you want?” Evan walked over and grabbed his hand.

“You to come here.” Jared said, yanking Evan’s arm.

Evan gasped slightly as he fell onto the bed.

Jared grinned at him. “Hi.”

“Hi.”

Jared shifted around as Evan straightened himself out and settled his head on Jared’s shoulder.

“Jared…”

“Hmm?” Jared was running his fingers through Evan’s hair.

Maybe Evan had just been imagining things. Maybe nothing was weird.

“Do you want to watch TV or something?”

“We can if you want.” Jared said, closing his eyes. “I’m probably gonna pass out though.”

“Mmmm.” Evan sighed. “That sounds nice actually.”

Jared pulled Evan closer and rested his chin on top of Evan’s head. “You should set an alarm.” He said. “I need to be home for dinner.”

“Why don’t you set it?” Evan grumbled, already digging his phone out of his back pocket.

“’M sleeping Evan.” Jared mumbled.

Evan set an alarm for five p.m. and then fell asleep thinking about how stupid he was for thinking Jared was mad at him.

Only the next day wasn’t any better. Jared was perfectly pleasant in conversation and he smiled at Evan and laughed at his own jokes. But he didn’t touch him except briefly when he made a joke about how they should win senior superlative for hottest couple and threw his arm over Evan’s shoulders.

Evan knew Jared had things to do after school that day so he didn’t ask him to come over. But he did grab Jared’s arm before he left.

“Hey.”

“What’s up?” Jared asked.

“Um… can I call you tonight?”

Jared raised an eyebrow. “Sure. Something wrong?”

“No. Um… no. I just want to talk to you about something.”

“Okay.” Jared continued to eye him suspiciously. “Well yeah. I’m free after like eight.”

“Kay. See you later.”

“Bye Evan.” Jared frowned at him for another second before turning to go.

“Hey.” Jared answered on the first ring. “You gonna tell me why you’re acting weird?”

“Um…” Evan tapped his pen on his knee. “I was actually gonna ask why _you_ were acting weird.”

“Huh? I wasn’t.”

“You are. I mean…” Evan groaned. He knew he should’ve written down what he wanted to say first. “It’s just that whenever we’re at your house or my house you’re so… touchy.”

“Yeah.” Jared clearly wasn’t following.

“And then we go to school.” Evan continued. “And you like… go out of your way to touch me as little as possible. I just don’t get it.”

“Oh.”

“If you didn’t want to tell them-”

“No.” Jared interrupted. “It’s not that. I’m honestly glad they know.”

“Then what is it?”

“It’s nothing. That sounds like- look, it really isn’t anything.” There was a rustling as Jared shifted. “I’m just not really big on PDA you know? I like it when it’s just us. But I’m sort of uncomfortable being all coupley in public.”

“Oh.” Evan relaxed. It wasn’t his fault. Jared wasn’t mad at him. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I dunno.” Jared said. “I guess I figured you’d feel the same way.”

Evan thought about that. He decided that was a surprisingly reasonable train of thought.

“I’m sorry if I made you feel bad.” Jared said quietly.

“What?” Evan frowned. “No it’s fine.”

“Okay. You just seem upset.”

“I’m not. I was just thinking. It’s okay if you don’t like that stuff I just didn’t know.”

“If you want me to be more-”

“No. No. Don’t do anything if you’re uncomfortable. Really Jared I’m not upset. I just thought you were mad or something. But now I understand. So it’s okay. I’m okay.”

“Okay.” Jared laughed. “Good.”

The next day Jared woke up late. He didn’t show up to school until halfway through second period. He was furiously texting Evan as he scrambled to get ready. Evan pointed out that pausing to type was only making him more late which Jared ignored.

He then spent the break making up the assignment he’d missed at the beginning of history. So Evan didn’t see him until lunch.

“Don’t worry everyone, I’m here.” He called as he walked up to the table.

“Oh great.” Connor said sarcastically.

Jared flipped him off and then sat down beside Evan. “Hello. How has your day been?”

“Okay.” Evan shrugged.

“Better now that I’m here?” Jared smirked.

“Sure.”

“Jared, did you ever watch that video I sent you?” Zoe asked.

“I did not.” Jared pointed at her. “I definitely forgot.”

“Why do I even bother sending you funny tweets.” Zoe shook her head.

They continued to playfully bicker the rest of lunch. But Evan didn’t pay much attention because from the second they sat down to the second the bell rang, Jared had been holding his hand. He stopped once when he and Zoe were threatening to fight each other but once he sat back down he grabbed Evan’s hand again.

When the bell did ring, Jared stood up and pulled his backpack on. “Walk me to class.”

“Evan always walks _me_ to class.” Zoe said, crossing her arms and arranging her face into a dramatic pout.

“Well too bad he’s not _your_ boyfriend.” Jared said. He tightened his grip on Evan’s hand and tugged him toward the math and science building. “Come on.”

Evan shot Zoe an apologetic look that she waved off with a smile.

After school Evan met his gang of friends in the parking lot. They were arguing about whether or not they should go to the Murphy house. Zoe wanted everyone to come over. Connor wanted them to go anywhere else.

“I hate people in my house.” Connor crossed his arms.

“They’re not gonna be in your room Jesus Connor.” Zoe huffed. “We’re all gonna be downstairs.”

“Fine. Whatever.” Connor pulled the driver door of his car open and got in, slamming it behind him.

Zoe grinned triumphantly.

“You guys have fun with that.” Jared said. “I personally have about seventeen hours of homework so I will be dying at home.”

“Booo!” Zoe punched him. “Nerd.”

Jared rolled his eyes. “I’ll see you guys tomorrow.”

“Bye Jared.” Zoe called, as she and Alana got into the car.

Jared waved and then turned to Evan. “Bye.”

“Bye.”

Jared glanced at their friends and then quickly grabbed Evan’s waist and kissed him. Then he spun around and walked off. Evan smiled even as he felt his face heat up. He climbed into the back of Connor’s car and Zoe twisted around in the passenger seat to look at him.

“That was surprisingly sweet for Jared. Didn’t’ think he’d be so bold.”

“Yeah.” Evan nodded, smiling at his hands. “He doesn’t really like PDA.”

“Well…” Zoe caught his eye in the rearview mirror. “He sure likes you.”


	2. Everything He Says Has to Be Wrapped in Four Layers of Sarcasm

“Hey.” Evan nodded as Jared walked into the Murphy’s living room. “Just get here?”

“No Evan, I’ve been here for days. I’ve been living in Zoe’s closet.”

Evan sighed. Jared was funny most of the time. But sometimes the sarcasm was a bit exhausting.

“I thought I heard a rat in there.” Zoe teased, hip checking him on her way to the fridge.

“What do you have to eat in this house?” Jared hopped up to sit on the counter and pulled Evan to stand between his legs. Mostly so he could rest his chin on Evan’s head.

“We have snacks and stuff in the cupboard.” Zoe motioned. “But we’re gonna order pizza soon.”

Evan was distracted by Jared playing with his fingers. He waited until Zoe left the kitchen with an armful of snacks.

“Are you okay?”

“No. I have many issues.” Jared said seriously.

“Jared.” Evan shoved him.

“What?” Jared laughed. “I’m fine. Why?”

“You seem fidgety.”

“Yeah…” Jared frowned. “I’m always fidgety. You know I can’t sit still.”

“Yeah but it seems more prominent.”

“Prominent.” Jared snorted. “Okay Prince Evan of Hansen.”

“That’s not how that works.” Evan crossed his arms. “Also stop being a dick.”

“I’m sorry.” Jared took his hand. “There’s really nothing wrong though. I’m having fun.”

“Okay.” Evan nodded. “Let’s go sit.”

“Fine but if you order that gross pizza you always get I’m not sitting by you.”

“Pineapple pizza is good.”

“Whatever you say your royal highness.” Jared snickered as he hopped of the counter.

The annoying part wasn’t the sarcasm, per say. It was the timing. Or rather, it was the fact that he was sarcastic _all_ the time. Evan genuinely did find Jared funny, even when he was teasing Evan or making dirty jokes. But he wished that just sometimes Jared would be able to get through one conversation without having to make ten jokes or only replying with sarcasm.

Like now.

“It’s so _tragic_ honestly.” Jared was saying. “I mean how could you possibly _survive_ a test on a _Monday morning_.”

“Jared.” Evan punched him. “Quit it.”

Jared grinned at him. “I’m just teasing.”

“You’re always just teasing.” Evan grumbled.

“Don’t be mad.” Jared bumped his shoulder. “It’s just a joke. You know I whine about tests more than anyone.”

That was true.

“Yeah so how come you make fun of me for it?”

“Because,” They came to a stop outside of Evan’s classroom. “I am a hypocrite and _you_ ,” He booped Evan’s nose. “Are fun to make fun of.”

Evan crossed his arms.

“And I like you and don’t know how else to express it?” Jared tried.

“Not true anymore.”

“Because it gets your attention.” Jared poked him in the side. “And I like when you pay attention to me.” He smiled sweetly.

Evan knew it was fake but he rolled his eyes and let it go.

“Whatever. See you at lunch.”

“Bye.” Jared leaned up and kissed his cheek quickly. Something he only did when Evan got annoyed at him.

Evan smiled even though he was supposed to be mad. Jared was always doing that to him. Pushing his buttons and then doing something sweet so Evan couldn’t keep being annoyed. Jared wasn’t the mushiest person, but he sure knew how to romance his way out of trouble. And Evan was fully aware he was doing it. But Jared was just so cute sometimes. And so soft. It was hard to be mad at his stupid jokes for long.

“Hey.” Jared dropped down beside Evan at the lunch table and bumped his shoulder.

“Mmm.” Evan groaned in response.

“What’s that all about?” Jared frowned. “Are you still mad at me?”

Evan shook his head. “We have a presentation in sixth period and I’m nervous.”

“Ah.” Jared returned his focus to his food. “Well, as long as you don’t puke you’ll be fine.”

“ _Not_ helpful.”

“Come on. You’ve done presentations before. It’s no biggie.”

“But I’m not prepared.”

“So prepare.”

“I already feel sick.”

Jared slid his tray over. “Eat. It’ll help.”

Evan shook his head.

“Well,” Jared shrugged. “I guess if you don’t eat you won’t have anything to throw up. Problem solved.”

Evan laid his head down on the table. Jared was good when it came to panic attacks. But he’d never really gotten a handle on how to deal with the slightly less extreme anxiety Evan dealt with. Evan realized it was ridiculous to assume Jared would just instantly get better at it because they were dating now but… well he’d sort of been hoping for it anyway.

When the bell rang Evan groaned loudly.

“Come on Hansen.” Connor rolled his eyes. “We have to stand up there for three minutes. You’ll survive.”

“That’s a long time.” Evan mumbled.

“Evan.” Jared grabbed his shoulders and looked him in the eye. “You will be fine. Just remember… don’t fuck up.”

Evan punched his arm and Jared cackled.

“See you after school.”

Connor must have texted Jared. That was the only way Jared could have known where to find him.

“Evan?” His voice echoed around the bathroom.

“What?”

“Hey.” Jared knocked on the stall door. “Let me in.”

“This is sort of a private moment.” Evan said. Also he was in the largest stall and walking away from where he was kneeling in front of the toilet seemed like a bad idea.

“Please don’t make me do this Evan.”

“Do what?”

“Just open the door.”

“No.”

There was a loud sigh and then a slight thud as Jared dropped his backpack. And then Jared was crawling under the stall door muttering, “Ew ew ew ew ew.”

“That’s disgusting.” Evan mumbled.

“I told you to open the door.”

Evan shook his head and leaned over the toilet again. Jared rubbed his back as he wretched. It was kinda gross seeing as Jared was covered in bathroom floor germs but Evan appreciated it anyway.

“What happened?” Jared asked softly when Evan finally leaned back against the wall.

“I told you. I wasn’t prepared.”

Jared just nodded.

“I forgot everything I was supposed to say and everyone just kept _looking_ at me.”

“Well, that is typical when you’re doing a presentation.”

Evan shot him a glare.

“Sorry. I’m sorry.” Jared tapped Evan’s foot with his own. “I’ll stop.”

“I just got… overwhelmed. And then I got incredibly nauseous so I left.” He hung his head. “And now we’re gonna get a zero.”

“I’m sure she’ll understand Evan.” Jared scooted closer to him. “This isn’t just you being lazy or anything. She’ll let you redo it.”

Evan groaned.

“Or!” Jared said quickly. “Maybe you can talk to her about doing something else to make up the points. Like an essay or something.”

“I can’t ever look at her again.”

“She’s your teacher.” Jared snorted. “You have to.”

“I can’t.” Evan buried his face in his knees.

“I’ll go with you if you want.” Jared said softly. “To ask her about making it up.”

“You will?” Evan looked up.

Jared nodded. “If it would help. I promise I won’t say anything dumb or annoying.”

Evan debated how likely that was. “Okay.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. I want you to come.”

“Okay.” Jared looked around. “Can we please get off of the bathroom floor?”

“And go where?”

“Home.” Jared stood up and held out his hands to pull Evan to his feet. “School’s out in like fifteen and I don’t think you’re planning to go back to class.”

Evan shook his head. “What about you though?”

Jared unlocked the stall and motioned to his abandoned backpack. “I figured I wouldn’t be going back either.”

“Oh god.” Evan started to put his hands over his face but then he stopped himself. “Ew.”

“Good call.” Jared laughed. “Why ‘oh god’?”

“My stuff is still in class.”

“I’ll go get it.”

“You don’t have to-”

“I’m already going and getting it!” Jared called, as he rushed out of the bathroom.

Evan went to the sink and washed his hands twice. Then he rinsed out his mouth and splashed water all over his face for good measure. What he really wanted was a shower and a toothbrush. But this would do for now.

Jared came back within two minutes, holding Evan’s backpack and hoodie. “Viola.” He passed them to Evan. “Let’s dip.”

“Where are we gonna go?” Evan asked, pulling his backpack over his shoulders. “Your mom will be mad if you get home early.”

“Then we’ll go to your house genius.” Jared took his hand and pulled him out of the bathroom and down the hall.

“Hey.” Jared said when Evan emerged from the bathroom freshly showered and changed. “I’m sorry I didn’t take you seriously earlier.”

“It’s okay.”

“It’s not really though.” Jared said, he tilted his head. “It sucks. I’m your boyfriend. I’m supposed to be the person you can come to about this stuff, and anything really, and trust that I’ll understand and try to help. I should’ve… responded in a better way than I did. And I’m sorry for that. I don’t want you to think that I think your anxiety is a joke or anything. Or that it isn’t serious. Because I know it is. And I will try to be more understanding and uh… accommodating, in the future.”

“Wow. That’s like the longest you’ve ever talked without making a joke.” Evan said, impressed. He recognized the therapy talk. He sat beside Jared on the bed. “Thank you. That is nice to hear. I appreciate it.”

Jared nodded. He took Evan’s hand.

“You washed your hands right?” Evan grimaced slightly.

“Oh several times.” Jared assured him. “I also plan to burn that shirt.” He pointed to his shirt that was now on Evan’s floor. He’d replaced it with one of Evan’s.

“Good.” Evan relaxed. “Thanks for being there today.”

“No problem.” Jared squeezed his hand. “Sorry it took me so long.”

Jared kept his promise and got to school thirty minutes early the next day. They figured fifteen would have been enough time to talk to Evan’s Spanish teacher. But they needed another fifteen to talk Evan into actually doing it.

“Come on. It won’t be bad.” Jared tugged him toward the room.

“It will.” Evan whined, trying to drag Jared the other way.

“I had her last year she’s so nice!” Jared finally got him to the door. He paused before opening it. “It’s going to be okay. I’ll be right there the whole time.”

Evan groaned but nodded. Jared opened the door and ushered him inside.

“Ah. Mr. Hansen.” Evan’s Spanish teacher smiled like she was expecting him. “Here to talk about your project?”

“Hi Ms. Ramon.” Evan said quietly. “Yes.”

“And Mr. Kleinman. I haven’t seen you in a while. Do you need something too?”

Jared shook his head. “I’m here for moral support.” He jerked his thumb at Evan.

Ms. Ramon nodded. “Well Evan, what are we going to do about you?”

“I’m really sorry.” Evan blurted. “I don’t do well with speaking- uh public speaking. And I don’t- I’m not comfortable- I wanted to ask-”

Jared squeezed his shoulder. “You’re fine.” He said quietly.

Evan took a breath. “I was just wondering,” He spoke slowly so he didn’t trip over his words. “If I could make up the assignment. And if maybe I could make it up without the presentation part.”

Ms. Ramon smiled. “I think we could arrange that.” She said cheerfully. “If you go ahead and turn your presentation into an essay, I will grade that instead.”

Evan sighed and released the tension in his shoulders. “Thank you.”

“De nada.” She said. “Now if that’s all. I have a _lot_ of Spanish one worksheets to grade. I’ll see you later Evan.”

Evan thanked her again as they left.

“Oh and Jared!” She called.

Jared caught the door before it closed and popped his head in. “Yeah?”

“You two are good together.” She winked. “Congratulations.”

Evan could hear her from the hall and he blushed violently.

“Thanks.” Jared said, letting the door close.

Evan was surprised to see his face was red too.

They sat on the floor in the hallway, waiting for their friends to show up.

“That was so embarrassing.”

“Asking her to redo the assignment or the fact that she instantly picked up that we were dating?” Jared laughed.

“Both.”

“The second thing _was_ a little embarrassing.” Jared admitted. “But the rest of it was fine. You did good.”

“It helped that you were there.”

“Good.” Jared leaned his head on Evan’s shoulder. “I’m glad I can make you feel better.” He laughed slightly. “You know, when I’m not making it worse.”

“You never make it worse.” Evan said.

Jared snorted.

“Okay _sometimes_ you make it worse.” Evan nodded. “But mostly, you make it a lot better.”

“You always make it better for me.” Jared said, so quietly Evan almost missed it.

He waited for the joke but it didn’t come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You know I couldn't write a fic about Jared without mentioning his chronic sarcasm.


	3. He Will Zone Out When He's Supposed to be Listening

“Hey.” Evan smiled as Jared walked up.

“Morning.” Jared mumbled. He took Evan’s hand. He still wasn’t comfortable kissing Evan in public. Or doing most other physically affectionate things. But after their talk (and plenty of reassurance that Evan wasn’t pressuring him) he did start holding Evan’s hand a lot more. Which Evan enjoyed very much.

“You okay?” Evan tilted his head. “You look upset.”

Jared shook his head. “Tired. Got like three hours of sleep.”

“Why?”

“I may or may not,” Jared held up a finger. “Have accidentally played video games until three a.m.”

“You’re so dumb.”

“It wasn’t on _purpose!_ ”

“You can’t accidentally stay up until three.”

“Oh you absolutely can!” Jared argued. “Guys.” He waved their friends over. “Is it possible to accidentally stay up way too late unintentionally on accident? Yes or no.”

“Yes.” Connor and Zoe said in unison.

“No.” Alana put her hands on her hips. “How do you not notice the time?”

“Because you haven’t looked at the clock in four hours.” Jared shrugged.

“Why would you not be paying attention to the clock?” Alana looked thoroughly confused. “Especially when it’s already late I mean, don’t you keep checking so you know when it’s time to stop whatever you’re doing and go to bed?”

Jared squinted at her. “Is it nice not having ADHD?”

Alana tilted her head.

“The point is,” Evan sighed. “Maybe you should set an alarm for like midnight so you’re forced to notice the time.”

“You underestimate my ability to ignore alarms Evan.”

Evan rolled his eyes as the first bell rang. “See you later.”

Jared squeezed his hand before letting go. “Adios.”

By the time lunch rolled around Jared seemed to be in a much better mood. He had all of his usual energy.

“You seem more awake.” Connor commented, sounding disappointed.

“I took a power nap in third period. It really refreshed me.”

“Aren’t you supposed to be learning in third period?” Zoe asked.

“Aren’t you supposed to mind your own business Zoe?”

Zoe raised her hand and Jared ducked.

“I take it back!”

“That’s what I thought.” She patted Jared’s back.

Jared got up and shoved Evan over so he could sit on the other side of him. “You stay away from me.” He pointed at Zoe.

She stuck her tongue out.

“Can you two go a single day without one of you threatening to kill the other?” Evan sighed.

“No.” They said at the same time.

Jared leaned his head on Evan’s shoulder. “Not my fault she’s so violent.”

“You instigate.” Evan pointed out.

“I can’t believe you’re taking her side.”

“I’m not taking her-”

“This is unbelievable.” Jared cried. “My own boyfriend.”

“You’re so dramatic.” Evan elbowed him.

“Yeah and you love it.” Zoe snickered.

“Hey I was gonna say that.” Jared grinned at her. “Friendship reinstated.”

“Yippee.” Connor droned.

“Hey.” Evan nudged Jared. “Can I come over today?”

“I wouldn’t stop you.”

Evan raised an eyebrow.

Jared sighed and rolled his eyes. “Yes. Come over.”

Evan had a history test that day. He knew he failed it. And he’d spent the whole afternoon trying to _forget_ about it but then Jared asked how it went. So Evan started ranting. It felt good to dramatically vent about how stupid the whole thing was.

“I mean I get that sometimes teachers don’t want to just give you direct questions and they want you to apply your knowledge or whatever. But this was just straight up material that she _never_ talked about like how was I supposed to-” He stopped as he looked over. “Jared.”

Jared was staring at the wall, clearly not listening.

“Jared!”

“What!” Jared jumped. “Sorry. What?”

“Were you even listening?”

Jared opened his mouth but stopped when he saw Evan’s face. “No.” He admitted. “But it wasn’t on purpose, I swear!” He got up from his chair and sat next to Evan on the bed. “I just zone out sometimes.”

“I know.” Evan sighed.

And he did know. Jared had always had attention problems. But Evan hadn’t noticed it as much before because he’d never talked for so long around Jared until they started dating. But now he noticed it _a lot._ He felt like at least once a day he had to call Jared’s name or nudge him to remind him that he was supposed to be listening. Evan knew it wasn’t intentional, but it was still annoying. And a little hurtful.

“I’m sorry.” Jared said. “You were talking about your test. Please tell me again.”

“It’s fine.” Evan shook his head. “It’s not important.”

“No come on.” Jared shook him. “Tell me. I’ll pay attention this time.”

Evan watched his puppy dog face for a while before he finally cracked and smiled. “Fine. Since it’s _so_ important to you.”

Jared straightened up. He crossed his legs and placed his hands in his lap. “You have my full attention.”

Dating Jared required a lot of repeating things. Not just long stories that Jared couldn’t be mentally present for the entirety of either. Little things. What time they were supposed to meet. What drink Evan had asked for. If they were hanging out Friday or Saturday. It was a little frustrating sometimes. But honestly, a lot of times it made Evan feel better. There was no need to worry about getting information wrong when he had three different text records of it.

And besides, Jared put up with all of Evan’s inconvenient shit so it was okay. Evan figured if the worst thing about dating Jared was that he had to repeat himself every now and then, it was still pretty great dating Jared.

“Jared.” Evan reached across the table and shoved him. They were getting food after school and Jared was being… difficult. “Jared. I need you to listen.”

“I am!”

“You’re on twitter.”

“I can still hear you.”

“Jared.” Evan kicked him under the table. “I need you to remember this.”

“Okay. Okay. Geez.” Jared set his phone down on the table. “I’m listening.”

“You need to be there at exactly five because otherwise she’ll make a big deal about how you suck because you’re not punctual.”

The she in question was Evan’s great aunt Marge. She was coming to town and Heidi had suggested that Evan bring Jared to dinner so she could meet him. Evan was only freaking out a lot. His great aunt Marge was a little bit terrifying and the thought of introducing her to Jared made Evan want to throw up. Not that she cared that Jared was a boy. She was just extremely judgmental about everyone she didn’t know. Especially significant others. One time, Evan’s cousin brought her new boyfriend to Thanksgiving and Marge made him _cry_. Granted, he did give her a lot to complain about. But still, that didn’t bode well for Jared.

“But I hate being punctual.” Jared whined.

“Jared please.” Evan begged. “This is important. She will find any reason to hate _anyone_. And you…” He stopped.

Jared raised his eyebrows. “What about me? Huh?”

“Look, _I_ know you’re great.” Evan said carefully. “But sometimes… when people don’t know you as well as I do… you can come off a little… you know…”

Jared crossed his arms and waited.

“Mean and disrespectful.”

“Wow Hansen.” Jared leaned back in his chair. “Tell me how you really feel.”

Evan stared at him, unimpressed.

“I can’t believe all these years of friendship have meant nothing to-”

“Jared please just be there on time!”

“Okay!” Jared laughed. “Six p.m. sharp.”

Evan glared at him.

“I’m _kidding_.”

“Five.” Evan pointed at him, standing up and grabbing his backpack. “Exactly.”

“Aye aye captain!” Jared called, watching him walk out.

Jared rang the doorbell at 5:01 because he loved nothing more than pissing Evan off. Evan swung the door open, ready to whisper yell at him but he faltered when Jared handed him something.

“Here.” He shoved it into Evan’s hands and stepped around him into the house.

“You- what?” Evan frowned. “What is this?”

“Green highlighters.”

“Right. I see that.” Evan raised an eyebrow. “But why?”

“Because you said your last green highlighter was dying and you use a ridiculous amount of green highlighters so.” He shrugged as he started kicking off his shoes.

“Oh.” Evan faltered. “Thanks.”

“No problem.” Jared leaned up and kissed his cheek.

“I was supposed to be mad at you.” Evan sighed, tossing the highlighters onto the table.

“Yeah.” Jared grinned. “Funny how that worked out for me huh?”

“Come on.” Evan grabbed his arm and dragged him into the kitchen.

“Aunt Marge, this is my boyfriend Jared.”

Marge looked Jared up and down. Jared smiled and held out his hand.

“Nice to meet you.” He shook her hand. “Thank you so much for having me.”

Evan raised his eyebrows. He’d half been expecting a joke of some kind.

“Nice of you to come.” Marge didn’t smile. “Three minutes late.” She added.

“That was my fault.” Evan jumped in. “We were talking in the hall.”

“Talking. Sure.” Marge scoffed.

Evan’s face burned and Jared struggled to suppress his laugh. Evan was about to start whispering pointers to Jared but he was already moving into the kitchen.

“Hey Heidi. Need any help in here?”

Heidi smiled at him, clearly a little shocked. “No thanks sweetie. I got it.”

“Are you sure?” Jared leaned on the counter. “I’m happy to help.”

Evan was pretty sure he was dreaming by this point.

“Well, if you insist.” Heidi wiped her hands on a towel. “If you want to peel and cut up these potatoes, that would be a big help.”

“Sure.” Jared walked over and started washing his hands.

Evan stared at him.

“You see that Evan?” Marge called from the couch. “Why didn’t you offer to help your mother? You could learn something from Jacob, despite his time management issues.”

“Jared.” Evan corrected absently.

“That’s what I said.” Marge waved him off.

Evan went over and started peeling potatoes for Jared to cut. “Who are you and what have you done with Jared Kleinman?” He whispered.

“You forget,” Jared whispered back. “That I am excellent with mothers. And by extension all older female relatives.”

“I do remember something about that.” Evan mused. “I guess I haven’t seen you meet any new mothers in a while.”

It was true. Jared was a sarcastic little shit most of the time. But for some reason, whenever a female adult was around he was able to turn into this sweet respectful young man which resulted in every mother he’d ever met gushing over him. Of course, Heidi knew him far too well to be fooled by that anymore. And it drove Jared’s own mother crazy that everyone said he was such a perfect son. She loved him to death of course, but she knew he was anything but a respectful young man.

“I’m an angel Evan. Don’t forget that.”

Evan snorted. “I wouldn’t go that far.”

They all sat down to dinner and Aunt Marge led them in a prayer. Evan and his mom shared a look. They weren’t really religious but whenever Marge came they pretended they were.

“Do you go to church Jared?” Marge asked, eyeing him.

“Marge.” Heidi said sharply but Jared didn’t seem bothered.

“Well I’m Jewish. But we don’t really practice except on the holidays.”

“Mmm.” Marge nodded. “And how are your grades?”

Heidi sighed.

“I’m a straight A student.” Jared said cheerfully. “I’m taking AP courses to prepare for college. It’s tough but I like the challenge.”

Evan nearly choked on his drink from laughing. Jared was smart, no question. But he wasn’t _quite_ a straight A student. But Marge was nodding approvingly so he kept his mouth shut.

“And how long have you and my little Evie been dating?”

Evan flushed bright red. He’d been hoping she wouldn’t bring up the name this time.

Jared looked delighted. “Well, _Evie_ and I first got together two months ago. But we didn’t tell anyone until about six weeks ago.”

Evan looked at him, surprised. He didn’t expect Jared to be so specific.

“A little soon to be bringing someone to meet the family.” Marge grumbled.

“It was my idea to invite Jared.” Heidi said calmly. “And besides, Jared’s mom is a good friend of mine from high school so I’ve known him his whole life. He’s a good kid.”

Evan rolled his eyes at that. Jared elbowed him sharply.

“Then what was with all that?” Marge waved her hand. “The secrecy and all.”

“Oh.” Jared glanced at Evan. “Uh.”

“Jared wasn’t out yet when we started dating.” Evan explained.

“The world is full of bigots.” Marge barked. “Cowards. In my day I used to beat up homophobes behind the school. Racists too.”

Jared leaned over and lowered his voice. “I love this woman.”

“Evie.” Marge squinted at him. “Have you applied to college yet?”

“Oh. Yeah. Um, I applied to three.”

“Four.” Jared corrected before shoving a piece of potato into his mouth.

“Right.” Evan shook his head. “Four. Um, and I’m applying for a lot of scholarships and stuff.”

“That’s a good boy.” Marge said. “Help out your poor mother.”

“Marge I can handle his college tuition.” Heidi said which Evan knew was not true. But his mother was a proud woman, so he didn’t say anything.

They all got a moment of peace when Marge went to the bathroom. It was almost amazing how all three of them started slouching at the same time.

Jared immediately turned and stabbed his fork onto Evan’s plate.

“Hey.”

“You don’t like onions.” Jared said through his mouthful of food.

True.

“You still don’t have to steal my food.” Evan mumbled. He blushed when he looked over and saw his mother watching them with a smile.

They heard footsteps and everyone quickly straightened up in their seats and prepared to be polite again.

“So how’d I do?” Jared asked as Evan walked him to his car.

“On making a good impression? Perfect.” Evan said. He stopped as they reached the car. “On not lying? Zero out of ten.”

“What?” Jared crossed his arms. “I only lied like five times.”

“Fine. Five out of ten.”

“I’ll accept that.” Jared smiled. He stepped closer and titled his head. “Successful boyfriend mission.”

Evan laughed. “You’re stupid.”

“Kiss me anyway.”

And Evan did.

“Wait what?” Jared shook his head. It was two days after the dinner and the ‘successful boyfriend mission’ was no longer getting Jared out of trouble. “I didn’t hear anything after Zoe shoved him in the pool.”

Evan sighed. “Why do I even bother?” He knew it was useless trying to tell Jared a story while they were sitting in front of the TV.

“I’m sorry.” Jared’s voice was surprisingly quiet.

“It’s okay.” Evan leaned his head on Jared’s shoulder. “I know you don’t mean to.”

“I wish my brain stopped going into screensaver mode.”

“I’ll repeat my stories fifty times if you want.”

Jared snorted. “Thanks. You’re sweet.”

“I am sweet.”

Jared moved to take Evan’s hand. He frowned. “What is this?” He pulled Evan’s arm in front of him and used his free hand to run a finger over a scar on Evan’s bicep.

Evan frowned. “I don’t… I don’t know.” He poked at it. “What the hell?”

“It’s such a weird place for a scar.” Jared mused. He moved Evan’s arm around. “Aha! There’s more.” There was another scar on the underside of his arm.

“What?” Evan twisted his arm to look at it.

“Oh!” Jared snapped. “Dracula!”

“Excuse me?”

“Dracula.” Jared repeated. “Remember that evil cat my mom tried to adopt when we were like ten? And then he attacked you and you had to go get like tested for rabies.”

“Oh my god yes.” Evan nodded. “Holy shit. I totally forgot about that.”

“How could you?” Jared laughed. “That’s where your fear of cats originated.”

“I’m not _scared_ of cats.”

“Right. You just go out of your way to avoid them at all costs.”

“Whatever.” Evan looked at his scar one more time. “I didn’t even realize that left a scar. I thought my only scar was that one on my thigh from-”

“From the bike accident.” Jared nodded.

“Yeah.” Evan glanced over. “You remember that?”

“Of course.” Jared twisted Evan’s hand around and started cracking his fingers. It was a habit Jared had gotten into recently. Evan didn’t mind but it always felt weird having someone else crack his knuckles for him. “It was pretty traumatic. You were screaming and crying and bleeding. I thought you were gonna die.”

“It was a little tiny scrape.”

“Yeah and I was seven.” Jared pointed out.

“Fair.”

Jared finally stopped fidgeting and relaxed.

“You remember funny things.” Evan said. “Like I didn’t think you’d know the exact amount of time we’ve been dating right off the top of your head.”

“I remember important things.” Jared shrugged.

“The fact that I’m running out of green highlighters isn’t really important.” Evan laughed.

“I remember things about you. So, same thing.” Jared fixed his gaze on the TV.

Evan didn’t know what to say to that. He leaned back into the couch and Jared shifted and leaned against him.

Maybe Jared didn’t listen. But he did pay attention.


	4. He Will Go to Great Lengths to Avoid Talking About His Feelings

“Hey. You never texted me back last night.” Evan said as Jared got into the car.

“Sorry.” Jared shrugged as he reached for his seatbelt. “I was having a moment.”

“A moment?”

“Yeah you know.” Jared waved a hand. “A little depression moment.”

“Wait what?” Evan frowned. “What happened?”

“Nothing _happened_. It’s just a thing that shows up sometimes and fucks me up and then leaves.” He shrugged. “No biggie.”

“Sounds like a big deal.”

“It’s okay dude.”

“Jared if something is wrong then talk to me.”

“Thanks _mom_ but I’m fine.” He stopped laughing when he glanced over and saw Evan’s expression. “Sorry. But seriously, it’s not anything you need to worry about. Okay?”

Evan didn’t agree about that but he let it go.

“Hey Jared.” Zoe walked up and slung her arm around his shoulder. “Feeling better?”

Jared nodded. “We good now.”

“You told Zoe?” Evan raised his eyebrows.

“Oh my god dude. I thought we were dropping this.”

Zoe looked between them. “Did I interrupt something?”

“No.” Jared sighed. “You started something.”

“Why her and not me?” Evan crossed his arms.

“Because I’m not dating her.”

“Oh yeah. That makes _so_ much sense.”

Zoe quickly slipped away from them. Jared looked like he wanted to go with her.

“Hey. Come on.” He poked Evan in the side. “Don’t be mad.”

“I’m not-!” Evan stopped and lowered his voice. “I’m not mad. I’m just… upset that you told Zoe and not me.”

“Okay well, I’m sorry.” Jared said. “I didn’t know it would be a big deal.”

Evan chewed his lip.

“Are we cool?” Jared asked.

They weren’t. And Jared knew it. But Evan wasn’t going to be petty and start a fight, so he nodded.

“We’re cool.”

“Okay.” Jared chose not to acknowledge the tone that meant they were not cool. “See you at break then.” He paused like he was going to hug Evan and then he turned and walked away.

“Was it like serious?” Evan asked, rocking back on his heels.

“No.” Zoe said. She shoved him when he narrowed his eyes. “Evan, it really wasn’t.”

“Then why didn’t he tell me?”

“I don’t know dude.” Zoe leaned against her locker. “Maybe because you freak out easily and he didn’t want that?”

“Well that’s a valid thing to freak out about.” Evan argued. “He’s so frustrating sometimes. He just-”

Zoe elbowed him sharply and nodded down the hall. “Hey Jared!” She called.

“Hey guys.” Jared glanced at Evan. He didn’t take his hand. “How goes it?”

“Good.” Zoe looked back and forth between them.

“I’m great.” Evan said, crossing his arms. “Or maybe I’m not. Who knows. It’s not important.”

Jared rolled his eyes. “Funny.”

“Alana!” Zoe nearly yelled as she spotted her girlfriend. “Thank god. Please start talking about something.”

“Okay!” Alana didn’t need to be told twice. She launched into a long winded rant about her econ project that lasted for the entire break. She talked right up until the bell rang. Jared didn’t say goodbye before walking off.

Evan texted Jared in fourth period that he wanted to talk. Jared agreed.

“Where the hell is he?” Evan checked his phone again. Nearly half of lunch had passed and Jared was nowhere to be found.

“Jared?” Connor looked up from his book. “Detention.”

“What?”

“Yeah. It was weird. Last like fifteen minutes of class he just stared being a smartass. I mean, more than usual. Which was dumb because he knows Johnson gives lunch detentions if you cough too loud.”

“Oh my god.” Zoe shook her head.

Evan ground his teeth. “He’s such a fucking idiot.”

“Cheers to that.” Connor raised his water bottle and turned back to his book.

“Did you purposely get _detention_ to avoid talking to me?” Evan snapped, as soon as Jared was in earshot.

“No.” Jared said innocently. “That was a total accident.”

“Fine. Well, we can talk now then.”

“I need to get home.”

“We’ll talk in the car.” Evan held up his keys. His mom had a rare day off which meant Evan was able to drive them to and from school.

“You know,” Jared started toward the exit. “I sort of feel like walking today.”

“Seriously?” Evan followed him outside. “You’d rather walk home than just fucking talk to me?”

“Evan.” Jared waved his hand in a flourish. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m talking to you right now.”

“Fine! Whatever.” Evan yelled. “If don’t trust me enough to talk to me about this stuff then don’t. I don’t care anymore.”

“Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.” Jared grabbed his arm. “Where did you get the idea that I don’t trust you?”

Evan glared at him. “Why else would you talk to Zoe and not me?”

“Because…” Jared suddenly stepped back and shrugged. “I don’t know.”

“Right.” Evan nodded. He watched as Jared stared at the ground and clenched his jaw. “I’m going home.”

“Okay no! Wait.” Jared stopped him again. “Please.”

Evan waited.

Jared tapped his foot and glanced around the parking lot. “I don’t… could we talk about it at your house maybe?”

“Jared stop stalling.”

“I’m not stalling.” His voice was shaky. “I just don’t want to do this here. Please?”

Evan softened slightly. “Fine.” He started toward the car. “But we’re talking the second we get upstairs.”

“Promise.” Jared nodded quickly.

“Hi honey.” Heidi called at the sound of the door. She peered around the corner from the couch. “Oh Jared! How nice to see you.”

“Don’t be nice to him.” Evan said sternly.

“Why not?”

“I’m in trouble.” Jared said, giving her a guilty smile. “Maybe you can be nice to me when I leave.”

“Oh I hope so.” Heidi laughed.

Evan dragged Jared upstairs and shut his bedroom door behind them. “Talk.”

“Jesus you’re so serious.”

“Jared!”

“Okay!” Jared sat on Evan’s bed. “I don’t not trust you alright?”

“That’s not enough explanation.”

Jared looked up at him. “You know, it’s easier to talk about this stuff when you’re comforting.”

“You lost comforting Evan privileges when you decided detention was more fun than talking to me.”

“Evan.” Jared sighed heavily. “It’s not… easy for me to talk about this stuff. With anyone. And it’s usually easier with you because you make me feel like… I don’t know. Like everything will be okay.” He mumbled.

And that was enough to break Evan’s resolve. He walked over and sat beside Jared.

“Okay, I’m sorry.” He said softly. “I’m here. I want to listen.”

Jared nodded. He took a breath. “Sometimes I have… periods of time where I feel very depressed. I feel like…” He frowned harder. “I feel like I’m a bad person. A bad son. A bad friend. A bad boyfriend. I feel like I don’t deserve all the good things in my life.”

Evan didn’t say anything. But he took Jared’s hand and squeezed it.

“I don’t really like talking about it because it makes me sound like I’m whiny. Or like I have no reason to feel this way. And I mean I _don’t_. My life is good. I shouldn’t feel like I don’t want to be here.”

“Jared-”

“Let me finish or I won’t be able to.” Jared cut him off. “I have a loving family. And good friends. And a really awesome boyfriend. And I know that. But sometimes everything just feels so heavy. So fucking heavy. And it’s like I can’t carry it all and it’s going to crush me and the worst part is,” Jared’s voice shook. “I can’t even ask for help because people look at me and all they see is the good stuff. I feel like I’m drowning but I’m not even underwater. And it’s so _stupid_.” His voice gave out as a few tears slid down his cheeks.

“It’s not stupid.” Evan squeezed his hand. “You don’t have to have a bad life to be depressed. You know that.”

“I know.”

“Jared…” Evan paused. He wasn’t sure how to say what he wanted to say. “I know I can’t make those feelings just… go away. But if you talk to me then I can try and help. I can distract you if you want. Or reassure you that you’re not a bad person. Or you can come over here and take a nap or something I just… I want to help.”

“I know you do. But I just don’t want to do that to you.”

“You’re not doing anything to me.” Evan shook his head. “This is part of my job as your boyfriend.”

“You don’t get it.” Jared shook his head. “Evan the reason I don’t want to tell you is because I know it’s hard to deal with.” He squeezed his eyes shut. “I don’t want you to decide it’s _too_ hard to deal with. Or that it’s not worth it.”

“I’m not going to decide that.” Evan said firmly. “You already know about all the shit I have going on.”

“That’s exactly my point. You don’t need mine too.”

“No that’s not what I mean.” Evan turned sideways to face him. “I mean, you know all of the shit I deal with. And you help me even though you have your own problems. So why wouldn’t I want to do the same for you?”

“Because I suck.”

“You don’t suck.”

Jared made a sad humming sound and leaned into Evan’s chest. Evan wrapped his arms around him and rested his chin on Jared’s head.

“You were right.” Jared said after a minute.

“About what?”

“This helps.” He mumbled. “I should talk to you more.”

Evan laughed. “You should also listen to me more.”

“There you go again with the jokes.” Jared turned and squished himself in closer. “I’m supposed to be the funny one Evan.”

“I can’t ever be funny?”

“No. It’s my thing.”

“Okay.” Evan brushed his hand through Jared’s hair. “What am I then?”

“You’re the beautiful intellectual.”

Evan hummed in thought. “I guess I can live with that.”

“You have no choice.” Jared said. He blindly reached a hand up and put it over Evan’s face. “It’s the role you get for having that face.”

Evan blushed and leaned down to bury his face in Jared’s shoulder. “Stop being nice while you’re crying it’s not fair.”

“Why not?”

“Because I can’t comfort you if I’m flustered.”

“You’re not flustered.” Jared sat up. He grinned. “Oh my god you are! Look at your face.”

“Shut up.”

“I still make you blush just from saying you have a nice face?” He poked Evan’s cheeks. “That’s cute.”

“Quiet.”

“No.” Jared’s eyes were still red and a little puffy but he looked happy again. “How do you expect me to not be excited that I made Evie blush.”

Evan narrowed his eyes. “Get out of my house.”

“No!” Jared laughed as Evan attempted to shove him off the bed. “Comfort me!”

“You deserve no comfort after that!”

“Evan!” Jared screeched as Evan continued his attack.

They ended up sprawled out on the bed, out of breath from trying to kill each other.

“I’m sorry about today.” Jared said, rolling over to lay on top of Evan. “That sucked.”

“It did.” Evan nodded. “I’m sorry too.”

“It’s okay.” Jared said.

And it was. Because Jared was difficult, he didn’t like talking about his feelings. But that didn’t mean he didn’t have them. It only meant that he was just as scared as Evan that they might be too much.


	5. He Has a Jealousy Thing

“Hey.” Jared stood on his toes and kissed Evan’s cheek.

Evan flushed, not expecting it. “Hi?”

“How was class?”

“Good.” Evan eyed him as they walked to his locker. “What’s up with you?”

“What do you mean?”

“You’re…” Evan frowned. “Never mind.”

After their initial talk, Evan didn’t think about the difference in physical affection between home and school anymore. He meant it when he said it didn’t bother him. Jared wasn’t comfortable with much more than holding hands in public and Evan was perfectly happy with that.

So it Jared’s recent behavior did not go unnoticed. It wasn’t just today. The past week he’d been glued to Evan’s side. He kissed him more than once in the middle of the hall even though he looked wildly uncomfortable, he was constantly putting his arm around Evan and leaning on him. It was very strange. Not that the affection wasn’t welcome, Evan enjoyed it of course. But Jared had been very clear about the fact that he _didn’t_ like it. So Evan was a little concerned about his sudden change of heart.

“Unfortunately,” Jared sighed dramatically as they reached their lunch table. “I cannot dine with you today. I must leave you to go make up the math test I missed last week.”

“Oh noooo.” Connor said, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

“I know.” Jared shook his head. “It’s a true tragedy. But you’ll survive without me. You just have to be brave.” He glanced across the campus suddenly. Then he leaned down and kissed Evan before waving. “Goodbye!”

“Hey.” Zoe slid over to Evan on the bench. “What’s up with him lately?”

“Okay so it’s not just me right?” Evan asked. “He’s being weird?”

“Totally.” Zoe nodded.

“I don’t know why he’s suddenly so clingy.” Evan dropped his chin into his hands. “I don’t have a problem with it obviously it’s just… I know there’s a _reason_ he’s doing it. Like, I know he doesn’t just want to. And I don’t know what the reason is.”

“Haaaaave you tried asking him?” Alana suggested.

“No.”

Connor suddenly groaned very loudly.

“Would you like to contribute something Connor?” Zoe raised an eyebrow.

“No.” Connor said flatly. “But if it’ll make us stop talking about Jared sooner, then fine.”

Evan leaned forward.

“Jessica whatever her last name is. With the ponytail.”

“Alvarez.” Evan nodded. “Yeah she’s in my third period.”

“Yeah she’s in me and Jared’s fourth period. She has a crush on you. Talks about it constantly.”

“So?”

“So,” Connor rolled his eyes. “Jared always looks like he wants to throw her out the window when she does.”

Evan frowned at him.

Zoe elbowed him. “He’s jealous Evan.”

“But why?” Evan shook his head. “I don’t even like her.”

“Doesn’t matter. She’s pretty and _she_ likes _you_. And, no offense,” She patted his arm. “But Jared’s never really had any competition for you. Other than me, and we all know how much he hated me.” She snorted.

“But she’s not competition if I don’t- wait Jared never hated you.”

Zoe laughed. “Oh yes he did. When you and I were dating Jared was so cold to me. He was incredibly jealous. I knew he liked you way before you told me you guys were dating.”

“What?” Evan looked at Connor and Alana.

“He was a little meaner to her than to me.” Alana shrugged. “But I didn’t really think anything about it.”

“He was a dick.” Connor said.

“Okay well even if that’s true.”

“It is.” Zoe assured him.

“ _Even_ _so_ ,” Evan went on. “This is totally different. I’m _dating_ Jared now. He knows I like him.”

“So what?” Zoe shrugged. “If some hot guy was talking about how dreamy Jared was and how he wanted to ask him out, you’re saying you wouldn’t have any feelings about that?”

“Okay… maybe I would have a few feelings.” Evan admitted. “But… why the clinginess?”

“Because he’s a stupid boy.” Alana said, exasperated.

Zoe nodded. “He’s marking his territory.”

“Isn’t that a dog thing?”

“Yes.” Zoe said seriously. “That’s why I said it.”

Despite his friends’ claims, Evan wasn’t totally convinced that Jared was jealous. He just didn’t seem the type. He walked around like he was hot shit and he never failed to remind Evan that he was way out of his league (playfully, of course, but that had to count for something.)

So it was hard to imagine Jared being jealous just because a girl said Evan was cute. Or doing things out of his comfort zone to prove that Evan was _his_ boyfriend.

But then again… the more Evan paid attention, Jared’s weird attitude seemed to increase when he walked Evan to third period. And at lunch right after fourth period. So maybe Connor and Zoe were on to something.

The new problem was, how was Evan supposed to bring it up? Asking him flat out was a hard no. The embarrassment if he was wrong was unimaginable. The image of Jared laughing because ‘you though I was _jealous_ dude?’ Absolutely not.

So maybe he needed a way to make Jared admit it on his own. Flirting with Jessica presented many problems. First of all it was cruel to her. Evan couldn’t pretend to be interested in this girl just to prove a point to his boyfriend. Besides that, he’d definitely hurt Jared’s feelings. Of course, the most glaring issue with that would be that Evan had no idea how to flirt anyway. But maybe he didn’t need to flirt. Maybe if he just… innocently brought up her name a few times…

“Hey, come over.” Evan poked Jared in the side as he waited for him to put his stuff in his locker.

“Mmmmm. Sure.” Jared closed his locker and leaned against it. “But only, if you buy me a milkshake on the way home.”

“Deal.”

Evan waited until they were home before starting his investigative work. He was still sort of nervous. He wanted Jared to admit, or at least be obvious about, his jealousy. But he didn’t want to _actually_ upset Jared. He needed a careful balance of talking about her, without making it seem like he was interested in her.

“Do you like those mint Oreos?” He asked casually. It seemed unrelated but… he had a plan.

“Huh?” Jared looked over. “No not really. I’m not a fan of mint and chocolate.”

“Mmm.” Evan nodded.

“Why?”

“We just got into this debate in third period.” He shrugged. “This girl Jessica said those ones are the best. But then I said the orange Halloween ones are better and she agreed. It was a fun conversation.”

“Jessica Alvarez?” Jared asked. His voice was calm but Evan noticed his leg suddenly stopped shaking.

“Yeah. You know her?”

“She’s in my econ class.” Jared stared at his notes. “I didn’t know you guys were friends.”

“We talk in class sometimes.” Evan shrugged, watching Jared carefully. “She’s funny.”

“I bet she is.” Jared grumbled.

“What was that?”

“Nothing.” Jared started writing again, very aggressively.

“Well anyway, the whole class started arguing and even our teacher was part of it. And Jessica was like, ‘damn I was just trying to make conversation with you’ and stuff. So we ended up just talking in the corner while everyone was fighting.”

“Wow.” Jared was grinding his teeth. “How fun for you.”

So maybe Connor and Zoe were right.

“I was talking to Connor today about something.”

Jared looked up, thrown by the change in topic. “Sure.” He raised an eyebrow.

“He mentioned that you guys have a class with Jessica. And that she uh… has a crush on me. I guess?”

Jared stared at his notes intently but the tips of his ears were red. “Is that so?”

“That’s what I hear.”

“Fascinating.”

“Jared.” Evan tugged his notebook away. Jared continued to stare at the place where it’d been. “Are you… do you… uh…”

“Am I jealous that Jessica likes you?” Jared guessed. “No.”

Evan sighed.

Jared looked up. “Maybe.” He crossed his arms. “So what if I am?”

“So… is that why you’ve been acting all weird?”

Jared started to argue but he stopped when Evan raised his eyebrows. “Yes.”

“Why didn’t you just tell me?”

“It wasn’t about you.”

“Your jealousy about someone else liking me… wasn’t about me?”

“No.” Jared said. “It was about her not respecting that you have a boyfriend.”

“Did you _tell_ her that we’re dating?”

Jared’s cheeks turned pink. “No.”

“Uh huh.” Evan kicked him lightly. “Jessica is nice. If she knew I had a boyfriend she wouldn’t have done anything.”

“ _Did_ she do something?” Jared asked.

“No!” Evan rolled his eyes. “I mean like… going forward.”

“Well, maybe you should tell her then.”

“I will. I didn’t know I needed to. But if it’ll make her stop talking about me in front of you then sure.”

Jared stretched out across the bed and put his head in Evan’s lap. “It’s not a big deal.”

“It clearly is.”

“Okay fine. It’s very annoying.”

“Right.” Evan played with his hair. “Well I’m sorry it’s annoying. But you don’t have to be jealous about it. I mean… I don’t- I’m not unhappy with you. I don’t care who else is interested.”

“How romantic.” Jared fake swooned. “You’re not unhappy with me.”

“Shut up. You know that’s not what I meant.” Evan sighed. “I’m very happy with you. I like you a lot.”

Jared smiled. “I know. I like you a lot too.”

“Hey, were you jealous of Zoe when I was dating her?”

He fully expected Jared to say no, whether it was true or not. So he was shocked when Jared shrugged.

“Yeah totally.”

“Really?” Evan frowned.

“One day you’re gonna realize how attractive you are Evan.” Jared sighed, closing his eyes. “Which is why I had to swoop in now. So by the time you realize what a mistake you’ve made, it’ll be too late.”

“Dating you isn’t a mistake.” Evan said, even though he knew Jared was mostly teasing.

“Mmmm.” Jared said noncommittally.

“Hey.” Evan grabbed his upside down face. Jared opened his eyes. “Stop being self-deprecating.” He demanded.

“But it’s so fun.”

“I don’t care.” Evan leaned down and kissed him. “You’re great. You’re a fantastic boyfriend and I won’t hear any arguments.”

Jared smiled. “Fine. If you insist.”

Evan was serious about talking to Jessica. He just felt _extremely_ weird bringing it up. What was he supposed to say? _Hey Jessica, I know you have huge crush on me and the reason I know is because you talk about it in front of my boyfriend all the time did I mention I have a boyfriend?_ No way.

“Hi Evan.” Jessica smiled as she sat down in the seat in front of him and twisted around to talk.

God she really was pretty. Which made it even weirder to bring this up. Because as scared as he’d been that Jared would laugh at him for thinking he was jealous… he couldn’t even _imagine_ if he was wrong about this.

“Hey Jessica.”

“How is your day going? Anything exciting happen?”

And then Evan realized he didn’t have to bring up her feelings at all. It could be so easy. “Pretty good. My boyfriend brought me coffee this morning so I’m actually awake today.” He laughed in what he hoped was a casual way.

“Oh.” Jessica paused. “I didn’t know you had a boyfriend.”

“Yeah uh, I don’t know if you know him. It’s Jared? Kleinman?”

“Oh.” Jessica’s face went very red. “Yeah he’s in my next class.” She mumbled. Then she turned around and didn’t talk to him the rest of the period.

So Evan felt a little bad. But that feeling disappeared when he saw Jared come out of fourth period grinning. He walked up and took Evan’s hand. And he didn’t kiss him or put his arm around him which made Evan feel extremely relieved because it meant Jared was back to normal. No more forcing himself to prove to everyone that he and Evan were together. Just regular, snarky Jared. And Evan was thrilled.


	6. He's Terrified of the L-Word

Evan and Jared had been dating for three and a half months when Evan started to wonder about things. The future. A certain word neither of them had said yet.

Evan had never told anyone he loved them. But to be fair, he’d never felt like he loved anyone. He dated Zoe for a while before things ended. And he loved her sure, but he didn’t _love_ her. And he dated a girl named Lilian for two weeks in middle school but he definitely didn’t love her.

And he wasn’t totally sure he loved Jared. But… he thought he might. And he thought if he didn’t, he was definitely going to start soon.

There was just one tiny issue which was that Evan was pretty sure the L-word would send Jared down a very deep spiral of emotional issues. Not that they’d ever talked about it before but, it was pretty clear.

“Hey, hey.” Jared sat down beside Evan and slid something over to him.

“What is this?”

“Candy.” Jared said, lightly shoving his head. “Duh.”

“Right.” Evan opened the ziplock bag full of mini candy bars. “But why?”

“Girl in my class was selling them for Valentine’s Day.”

“Oh.” Evan smiled. “Thanks.”

Valentine’s Day was on a Friday so their school went all out trying to cram as many Valentine’s Day activities as possible into one day. Including the Valentine’s dance that evening which was almost disgustingly pink and heart themed. Jared had informed Evan that he would absolutely not be going to that. Evan agreed wholeheartedly. But they did have plans to hang out, order pizza, and make fun of the many terrible romcoms Netflix had to offer.

The bell rang and Evan stood up. Jared grabbed his backpack and elbowed Evan.

“See you after class. Enjoy fifth period.”

“What?” Evan frowned.

“I said enjoy the rest of your day.” Jared winked.

“You definitely didn’t say that!” Evan yelled after him.

Evan spent all of fifth period trying to figure out what Jared meant. And not once did he consider what actually ended up happening. Because Jared wasn’t that kind of boyfriend. And he knew Evan hated attention. So he _didn’t_ buy Evan a Valentine gram. He didn’t. No way. And the blonde girl at the front of the room with a wagon full of teddy bears and roses was _not_ going to read his name and make everyone look at him while she handed him those things and a note. Because Jared wasn’t a completely terrible person.

“Evan Hansen.”

Evan didn’t raise his hand because he was too busy texting Jared under his desk that he was going to kill him.

But oh so luckily, Vanessa, who sat next to him, perked up and said, “This is Evan!”

The blonde girl walked down to his desk and set a rose, an envelope, and a little stuffed bear holding a heart on his desk.

She cleared her throat. “This is for Evie from your secret admirer.” She said in a tone that made it clear she expected him to be excited and curious. Instead, his face just turned even redder.

He mumbled, “Thanks.” And sank down in his seat.

Once she was finished, Evan shoved the bear and the rose deep into his backpack and opened the note quietly. He recognized Jared’s handwriting instantly.

**Did you freak out? I know you did. My prediction: you threaten to kill me before you even read this. If I’m right you have to make out with me. If I’m wrong then I have to make out with you. See you after school. xoxo ;)**

So Jared’s prediction was right. And Evan _was_ going to kill him. Definitely.

But also… despite the embarrassment, it was sweet. Evan had never had a partner during Valentine’s Day. And he hadn’t really been expecting much from Jared “Valentine’s Day is a capitalist lie invented by Hallmark to make us spend money” Kleinman. So maybe it was terrible to have everyone look at him, but it was sweet of Jared to do it, even if he was mostly just trying to annoy Evan.

“Heeeeyyyyyyy.” Jared grinned at him as Evan made his way out of class.

“You’re the _worst_.” Evan punched his shoulder.

Jared cackled. “How red was your face?” He took Evan’s hand. “Did you say something embarrassing? Did she tell you the thing?”

“Very. No. And yes.”

“It’s amazing what five dollars can get you.” Jared sighed happily. “I wish I could’ve seen it.”

“I don’t want you to come over anymore.”

“Yes you do!” Jared yelled.

“Ug god _another_ running through the airport scene?” Jared groaned. He threw a piece of candy at the TV. “Booo!”

“It’s about the drama.” Evan said through a mouthful of popcorn.

“That’s stupid.” Jared shook his head as the woman on screen professed her love across the airport terminal. “They should just tell people they love them _before_ they’re getting on a plane.” He said. “Also, you can’t just _sprint_ through the airport. Where is airport security? That’s not allowed. She didn’t even go through the metal detector.”

“Do you think you’d ever do it?”

“What? Run through an airport? No I don’t want to be detained by-”

“No.” Evan shoved him. “Like… I know you don’t like to talk about feelings. But you know, would you ever tell someone you love them?”

Jared shifted. “Um… I don’t know.” He fiddled with the remote. “I don’t want to say I’d _never_ say it because… that would be kinda depressing. But I think it would take a lot of time. And I’d have to like… really mean it.”

“That makes sense.” Evan nodded. He understood. He didn’t ask if Jared thought he’d ever really mean it about Evan. He was a little scared of the answer.

“Do you want another drink?” Jared asked suddenly, standing up. “I want another drink.”

“I’m okay.” Evan shook his head.

Jared was in the kitchen for a while. Evan assumed he was doing that thing he did when he got uncomfortable where he paced around and talked to himself until he calmed down. His theory was supported by how normal Jared looked when he returned.

He sat on the couch and put his arm around Evan and they didn’t talk about love anymore.

Jared spent the night which meant he took up most of Evan’s bed, pressed his cold feet into Evan’s legs, and hogged the blankets. And Evan loved it anyway. He complained plenty of course, he couldn’t let Jared _know_ he thought it was cute when he wrapped himself up in the entire comforter and laid half on top of Evan. So he whined and halfheartedly groaned at him to get off all while keeping his arms around him.

“This was fun.” Jared mumbled sleepily. “I guess I get why people like this shit.”

“Like… Valentine’s Day?”

“Yeah. And the candy and stuff.”

“So you’re admitting it’s not just a capitalist scam?”

“Oh no. It’s a scam. Definitely.” Jared twisted around to face Evan. “But scams can be fun when you get scammed with someone you really like.”

Evan laughed. “That was almost romantic.”

“I sent you a teddy bear and a rose.” Jared said, snuggling back into Evan’s chest. “I’m romantic as fuck.”

The flu went around the school ridiculously fast the next week. Connor said it spread so quickly from all the Valentine’s Day face sucking which was probably true.

But somehow, by some unfair miracle, Jared Kleinman was the only one of their friends to not get sick.

Zoe couldn’t say more than two words without coughing. Connor had a fever so high he slept in the bathtub on top of two bags of ice. Alana threw up three times before she even had time to decide not to go to school.

But Evan. Evan was going to die. He was one hundred percent sure that this was the end. He had all his friends’ symptoms and then some. He had a headache. He had chills so he wrapped himself in blankets and then he’d start sweating so much he had to fling them all away. He constantly felt like throwing up so he could barely drink water but he knew he was dehydrated too. And worst of all, his mother had to go to work on day two of Evan’s slow decent into death. And he was too weak to drag himself downstairs to get more water. So he was resigned to die.

Unfortunately, Jared had no intention of letting that happen.

“What the hell are you doing?” Jared put his hands on his hips.

“Laying.” Evan croaked.

“On the floor.”

“Yes.”

“In the bathroom.”

“Yes.”

“Get up.”

“Do you _want_ me to puke?” Evan asked, crossing his arms despite still laying on the floor.

Jared sighed. “Fine.” He sat down. He lifted Evan’s legs and placed them in his lap. “What happened to you?” It wasn’t in a sad concerned voice. It was in a ‘this is somehow your fault’ voice. “I saw you two days ago and you were totally fine.”

“I have a weak immune system.” Evan coughed violently. “Not my fault you never get sick ever.”

“I get sick.”

“In sixth grade,” Evan coughed and then squeezed his eyes shut and pressed a hand to his forehead. “Ow. Anyway, in sixth grade Ricky _licked your face_ when he was sick and you were still fine.”

“Yeah well that was my face. Not like we made out.” Jared tilted his head. “Now that I think about it, that may have been my gay awakening.”

“Ew.” Evan groaned. “Don’t talk about getting your face licked as anything other than disgusting.”

“I’m kidding.” Jared rolled his eyes. “My gay awakening was when Mason Thompson held my hand in seventh grade for a game in PE and I thought about it for two weeks and couldn’t figure out why.”

Evan smiled. “I remember Mason. He was cute.”

“You’re cuter.” Jared patted his knee. Then he scrunched up his nose. “I mean, maybe not at this exact moment.”

“Asshole.” Evan kicked him.

“Can we get off the floor?” Jared whined. “I set up a whole thing downstairs.”

“What?”

“Yeah. I brought movies and snacks. Well, the snacks are for me, you look like you’ll puke on me if you eat anything.”

“True.” Evan admitted. Then he sat up. “Wait. Don’t you- Oh god.” He scrambled over to the toilet and crouched over it.

“Ew.” Jared said even as he crawled over and rubbed Evan’s back.

“Anyway.” Evan said, leaning back after managing not to puke. “You’re supposed to be at school.”

Jared shrugged. “I felt bad leaving you here all alone while your mom was at work.”

“Yeah but,” Evan waved his hand. “School.”

“I’m gonna let you in on a little secret.” Jared lowered his voice. “I like you a lot more than school.”

“Okay but you’re gonna get in trouble.” Evan said. He was pretty sure his blush was very well concealed by his pale, sweaty face. “Your mom is gonna kill you.”

“She knows I’m here.”

“She let you ditch?”

Jared nodded. “She’s a big fan of you Evie.”

“Don’t.” Evan pointed at him.

Jared grinned. “I told her you were deathly ill and your mom was working and she felt so bad she let me come and take care of you.”

“Well that was nice of her. But you didn’t have to. I would’ve survived.”

“You told me you were gonna let the sickness overtake your body and accept death.”

Evan hummed. “You have a point.”

“Come downstairs.”

“Jared I can’t walk.” Evan sighed.

“I’ll carry you.”

“You will not carry me downstairs.” Evan shook his head. “That’s gonna kill me faster than the sick.”

“You never believe in me.” Jared said with mock offense. “But fine.” He stood up and held out his hands. “We’ll walk.”

Evan groaned but he let Jared pull him, slowly, to his feet. He hobbled his way downstairs and to the couch. He had to admit, Jared did set up a nice sick room for him.

The couch was covered in blankets including the giant soft red one from Jared’s bed that Evan always joked about stealing. (It wasn’t a joke.) There were two TV trays on either side of the couch with snacks and drinks scattered across them and a selection of movies on the coffee table.

“How long were you in my house before you came upstairs?”

“Like half an hour.” Jared said, depositing Evan onto the couch. “I also bought you painkillers because Heidi said you guys were low.”

“When did you talk to my mom?”

“I texted her that I was coming over.”

“You and my mom _text_ each other?” Evan stared at him.

“Occasionally.” Jared went into the kitchen and came back with two water bottles. “Also,” He sighed. “This is so embarrassing. My mom made you soup. Like, I told her you were sick yesterday and she made you soup so I could bring it to you today.”

Evan could cry. Mrs. Kleinman mothered him almost as much as Jared. “Tell her thank you a million times.” Evan coughed. “Also, you’re not allowed to say that’s embarrassing when you text my mom behind my back.”

“It’s not like it’s a secret. We’re always talking about you anyway.”

“That’s worse!”

Jared put his hands on his hips. “Stop complaining that your mom likes your boyfriend. Do you need anything before we start the movies?”

“No. I’ll take some of those drugs for my head and then I should be fine.” He grabbed the bottle of Advil. “I’m sweaty though so no blankets right now.”

“Mmm.” Jared nodded. He went into the kitchen and came back with a wet washcloth that he threw at Evan before dropping onto the couch.

“Um?”

Jared grabbed the cloth and folded it up. He placed it over Evan’s forehead. “Cold?”

“Yes.”

“Good?”

“Yes.” Evan laid his head on Jared’s shoulder. “Movie please.”

“I have to get up to put it in.”

Evan groaned loudly as Jared stood up and put the first movie in. He sat back down and pulled Evan into his side.

“How do you feel?”

“Very bad physically.” Evan said. “But very good emotionally.”

Jared snorted. “I’ll take it.”

“Evan.” Jared was shaking him which was not Evan’s favorite thing when he was hurting everywhere. “Wake up.”

“No.”

“Okay don’t.” Jared laughed. He was crouched in front of the couch by Evan’s head. “But I have to go.”

“Sleep over.”

“I really would.” Jared mumbled, kissing his head. “But my mother actually would kill me if I stayed over on a school night. This was a one day deal.”

“Mmmmm.” Evan said in reply.

“You make a strong argument, Evie.”

“Never mind.” Evan shoved him away. “Get out of my house.”

Jared laughed. He stood up and watched as Evan curled into a ball under the blankets. “What time is your mom off?”

“Eleven thirty.” Evan mumbled into Jared’s soft blanket.

“Oh good. That’s soon.” Jared crossed his arms. “I’m not getting that blanket back am I?”

“You are not.”

Jared sighed. “Fine. You can keep it for now.” He leaned down. “Because you’re sick and being a baby about it.” He kissed Evan’s cheek. “But I will get it back.”

“We’ll see about that.” Evan pulled the blanket tighter around him.

Jared shook his head. “I’ll see you uh… whenever you stop being dead.”

“Never.” Evan coughed. “Bye.”

“The rest of the soup is in the fridge if you ever feel like eating again.” He’d managed to get Evan to eat a little bowl of soup without puking.

“Thanks. Tell your mom I love her.”

“Will do.” Jared called as he headed for the door.

Evan was woken up again shortly after Jared left by his mother coming home.

“Hi honey, how are you feeling?”

“A little better.” Evan blinked sleepily at her. “I think my fever broke. But my head hurts still. And my throat.”

Heidi nodded. “You should get upstairs and go to bed.”

Evan sat up and rubbed his eyes. “I’m sorry about the kitchen.”

“What about it?”

“Jared’s mom made soup and we ate it and he made me tea.” Evan rambled. “I’ll do the dishes tomorrow. I should be-”

“Sweetie,” Heidi stopped him. “The dishes are done.”

“Huh?”

“They’re all clean.” She shrugged. “Jared much have done them before he left.”

“Jared,” Evan blinked. “Did the dishes? In someone else’s house? By his own volition?”

“It appears so.” Heidi smiled. “He’s a good kid.”

“He’s… something.” Evan shook his head.

“You _are_ still sick!” Jared pointed an accusatory finger at Evan after he coughed.

“I’m not! My throat is just dry.”

“You lured me here under the false pretense that you were not sick anymore.”

Evan rolled his eyes. “You ditched school to hang out with me all day when I was sick.” He pointed out.

Jared chose to ignore that. “If I get sick from you _now_ , I’m gonna end us both Evan. That is a promise.”

“You’re so dramatic.”

“Alright well if you’re so healthy now, I’m taking my blanket back when I leave today.”

“Noooo.” Evan whined.

“It’s mine!”

“It’s soft!”

“Yeah and _mine!_ ”

They didn’t do much because truth be told, Evan _was_ still a tiny bit sick and his energy wasn’t at full strength yet. So they watched movies on Evan’s laptop and Evan curled into Jared and swore he wasn’t sick. And Jared called him a liar and kissed him anyway.

Evan woke up in the dark and alone. He fumbled around for his phone to check the time. It was 2:07 a.m. and he had three texts from Jared.

**Jared <3: hey I had to leave and I didn’t want to wake you (because you’re still sick and need to sleep) see you tomorrow. <3**

**Jared <3: I know you’re asleep but I also know you’ll worry if I don’t tell you so, I made it home safely. Goodnight.**

**Jared <3: And I will take the blanket back one day.**

Evan looked down. Jared’s blanket was still draped across his legs. He smiled.

Jared didn’t tell Evan he loved him. But he didn’t have to. Evan knew there was more than one way to say "I love you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will make the Scott Pilgrim joke later don't you worry.


End file.
